11 September 2019

socks, texts, and other gifts

At the risk of coming off as self-absorbed, it's time to confess:  sometimes I struggle with feeling invisible.  Forgotten.  Out of sight, out of mind.  I get stuck thinking if I'm not purposeful enough in my relationships, my existence will fade.  The struggle is real; at least it is for me.  Don't misunderstand, it's not that I want to be the centre of everyone's universe, but I mean let's be real here, it's nice to know we're loved.  Right?

Most of the time, I can talk myself out of the funk that comes with believing I am unimportant to everyone, valued by no one.  I AM loved, of course.  And anyway, my value does not depend on others.  I find my worth in the eyes of my Jesus.

But here's the thing:  it helps to hear it out loud sometimes.

Awhile ago, a friend and I got together after she had come home from vacation, and she handed me a little box.  Now, I LOOOVE presents, but I was taken wasn't my birthday or Christmas, and my friend is not normally a "gifter" like me.  It was totally unexpected.  She just kind of laughed and said, "Open it!"  Inside was a pair of socks with sloths on them.  Yes, bring on the trumpets and fanfare!  What the heck for? you might ask.  Well, not only do I LOOOVE presents, I LOOOVE sloths.  I mean, the sloth is my totem animal.  But more breath-taking to me is that this friend, who is not into sloths or presents, saw this pair of socks in a gift shop and immediately thought of me.  She was away on vacation with her husband, when of course I would never expect to be on her mind.  Are you getting how valued that made me feel?

Another recent happening was that out of the blue one day, I received a text from a friend, saying she had been thinking about me and was praying for me that day.  Thinking about me?  Why?? I didn't text her.  I hadn't seen her in awhile.  I wasn't working to make sure I was on her radar.  Why on earth would I have come to her mind?  And then, not only did she think about me, she lifted me up to Jesus.  Again, I felt my value, all the way to my core.

My God never forgets me.  His eye is always on me.  This means that he is capable of bringing me to the minds of others when he knows I need "encouragement with skin on" because I'm feeling like I don't exist.

How lovely to be that gift of encouragement for my friends and loved ones.  I want to be a sweet reminder to others that they matter, that they are valued, that they are loved.

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